Cover Your Ass-Trology with Monthly Astrological

Forecasts and Horoscopes!

ySEPTEMBER 2024

After August’s walk on the wild side, September feels more like we’re strolling the mild side. That doesn’t mean it’s all chill all the time, but compared to last month? Piece of cherry cake! However….this is the beginning of eclipse season, so a bump in the frosting is possible. Read on, astro-cats.

The first significant astrological shift is Uranus’s annual retrograde on the 1st. This is your official notice to press pause on the change button. If you are itching for a personal revolution, this retrograde is a golden opportunity for introspection and personal growth. Ponder where you need to shake things up, but then wait to take action when Uranus stations direct on January 30, 2025. (Psst…this is the ideal time to catch up with old friends and associates.)

Next up: Pluto slides back into Capricorn on the 1st. This marks the last time the planet of transformation will be when the sign of the Mountain Goat. As election season looms in the United States, it’s time to ask: do we go backward to the past or move to the future? The next vote could be the most important because so much is on the line. Pluto retrograde in Capricorn has the effect of cleaning houses, which may be literal in the US political landscape. Pluto will station direct on October 11 and leave Capricorn on November 19. Deep breaths, and don’t forget to vote in November!

The New Moon in Virgo on the 2nd is stellar for new routines and regimens. If you’ve been off your game, messy, or overdoing anything, this lunation can help you right those wrongs. Any new health practices you put in place now have a chance of success. It’s also a great New Moon for applying for new jobs, adopting a pet, or cleaning up your space. Yes haw!

Get ready for the waterworks when Mars sets up camp in Cancer on the 4th. Mars doesn’t like being in emotional Cancer, but this transit can be a powerful tool for self-awareness and emotional control. Although this transit elevates protective energy (think Mother Lion), emotions can inspire actions, which isn’t always a good thing. Watch out for reactionary vibes—and ground yourself as much as possible. The more rooted you are, the less likely you’ll be carried away by your feelings. Mars remains here until November 3.

Mercury reenters Virgo on the 9th. This is a happy placement for the Trickster planet because Mercury rules Virgo. During this transit, which lasts until the  26th, you can analyze problems, troubleshoot solutions, fine-tune details, and research to your heart’s content! Practical thinking is in – so remember to focus on what matters. Instead of getting lofty, keep it real. 

The big news of September is the Full Moon Lunar Eclipse in Pisces on the 17th. This is a divine lunation for creativity, self-expression, sacrifice, letting go, and acts of compassion. Tune into your mystical, magical, caring side – and let your heart bleed! However, eclipses can be unpredictable, so expect the unexpected. Emotions could go off the rails, which could open up the gates of drama. You’ll want to avoid unhealthy escapist tendencies around this eclipse as much as possible. If you feel too sensitive, amplify your self-care practices – and be gentle with yourself. 

The Sun steps into Libra from the 22nd through October 22, your best month for strengthening relationships, making art, beautifying your surroundings, and making peace. The potential for harmony is high if you’re willing to compromise. This is also a lovely few weeks for social activity – and social justice. Network, march, protest, or get involved in your community. Yay!

Love turns hot, steamy, and sexy as hell when Venus slithers into Scorpio on the 22nd. Cue the Marvin Gaye, and let’s get it ON! Venus can be possessive, so guard against jealousy and controlling behavior. Instead, focus on building trust through quality time and honest conversations. Venus remains here until October 17, when it gallops off into Sagittarius. 

Thinking becomes refined, creative, and fair when Mercury moves into Libra on the 26th. During this period, you may be concerned with making situations feel equitable, whether that be your relationships or the world at large. You can find ways to get along, even with people who have opposing views. This transit can also bring out indecisiveness. If that’s you, try to keep that in check, or you’ll risk getting nothing done. Mercury will be in Scorpio on October 17.

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Annnndddd here’s your personal monthly horoscopes:

Aries:  You could be stepping into a leadership role at work this month, dear Aries. Of course, that’s right up your alley because you’re a great motivator. With the Sun and Pluto hitting the career zones of your chart, you’ll have the power to inspire your team to victory after victory. The New Moon on the 2nd could be the moment when your star rises. Be ready to say yes to new responsibilities. Your ruling planet, Mars, takes a ride through your domestic sector starting on the 4th. This means you’ll also be the driving force behind every family decision all the way until November. In other words: you’re in boss mode at work and home beginning this month! (You know you love it!). Take a break for me time on the 17th when the Lunar Eclipse shows up. It’s your best excuse to ditch out for some R ’n R. Relationships heat up on the 22nd when the Sun marches into Libra and Venus settles in Scorpio. This dynamic duo provides the perfect backdrop for intimacy and power couple vibes. Who’s on top? Shared power? Switch-hitting? Mercury will ensure you can negotiate the roles once it’s in Libra on the 26th.

Gemini: September is the perfect month to focus on your home and family, dear Gemini. The Sun hangs tight in your domestic sphere for the first three weeks, providing a gentle nudge to tidy up and secure the fortress. It’s also a sign that you may be in a leadership position with many loved ones, depending on your support. You can do this! The New Moon on the 2nd brings a change on the home front. It might be a move, a new family member, or a purchase for the nest. Whatever happens around that day will be a blessing, so be ready to welcome in the new at that time! Your ambition for cash accelerates when Mars dances into Cancer on the 4th. Hustle hard, and you’ll fatten up your accounts between now and November – just in time before the holidays! Family meetings and small gatherings at your pad keep you busy when your ruling planet, Mercury, shifts into Virgo on the 9th. There could be moments of tension, especially around the topic of politics. Keep it light if you want to avoid turning your home into a battleground. The Lunar Eclipse on the 17th marks a turning point in your career. You could receive a promotion or may decide to walk away from a project that doesn’t hold your interest. It’s also possible you might be in the public eye in an unexpected way. Whatever changes happen at that time will be for the best. Trust the vibe – and go with the flow. On the 22nd, the Sun will sail into your true love zone while Venus heads into the work sector of your chart. This means balancing work and pleasure will require fancy footwork for a few weeks. But remember, you’re adaptable, and this shouldn’t be a problem. In fact, it will make things more interesting. Mercury in Libra on the 26th will ensure you can find the beautiful words, whether you’re pitching woo or trying to win over the boss. 

Cancer: This is a busy month for you, dear Cancer. The Sun in Virgo at the beginning of September indicates lots of errands and short trips, so expect to be on the go. Important news arrives on the 2nd’s New Moon. It might be an announcement from a sibling or neighbor. Be ready to celebrate! But what’s even more exciting is the energy boost you’ll get when Mars moves into your sign on the 4th. No matter how active your schedule may be, you’ll have the pep in your step to keep up. The Lunar Eclipse on the 17th is perfect if you’re considering a long-distance journey. Circle that date in your calendar and book ‘em, Dano! Domestic matters need your attention when the Sun skates into your 4th house on the 22nd. Family demands could be great – but that’s your wheelhouse, so you’ll have no trouble handling their needs. The 22nd also puts Venus smack dab in the true love section of your chart. If you’re single, this is your green light to get ‘em, tiger! Partnered? Add some sizzle to your relationship with date nights or candlelit dinners – and watch the sparks fly! The month ends with Mercury joining forces with the Sun, the best combo for lively discussions around the dinner table. As the summer ends, you have plenty of reasons to feel warm and cozy. 

Leo: Finances increase this month, dear Leo, thanks to your ruler, the Sun, touring the financial sector of your chart. Suddenly, you’re attracting more of the green stuff, which will surely bring a smile to your face. The New Moon on the 2nd reveals a fresh income stream or side hustle. Be ready to pounce – it could be the cash cow you’re praying for. Mars in Cancer on the 4th provides the perfect cover for behind-the-scenes projects. If you want to make money on the down low, you’ll have months to make it rain without attracting too much attention. No matter how you bring the cheddar in the door, your golden touch will be indisputable. More good news: Mercury joins the Sun on the 9th, adding more brainpower to your earning capacity. Now you’re flush with money-making ideas. Schedule a session with your financial planner on the 17th’s Lunar Eclipse. You might find new ways to invest or an income leak you didn’t know about. You’re ready for late summer travel when the Sun heads into your 3rd house on the 22nd. Put a few short trips on your calendar to make the most out of the last of the warm weather. The 22nd also finds Venus in your domestic zone, which is lovely for updating your lair. New furniture, a splash of paint, or vintage wallpaper could be the perfect pick-me-up. Mercury in Libra on the 26th puts your mind on love matters. Have you been so busy getting the bag that you forgot to get some action? Let your flirty side loose – and you might finish summer with a fling or two! 

Virgo: it’s your season, so shine on, dear Virgo! The Sun is beaming rays of light your way, elevating your visibility big time. You’re a bit on the shy side, which makes this a bit uncomfortable, but if you lean into it, you might be surprised how wonderful it feels to be seen! The New Moon on the 2nd is YOUR day. You have tons of star power on this lunation, so wield that with confidence. Social activities ramp up when Mars bounces into your 11th house on the 4th. Parties, cool events, and celebrations will fill your calendar all the way into November. It’s almost like the holidays are coming early for you! More good news: your ruling planet, Mercury, will be in your sign on the 9th. This fires up your curiosity as well as your intellectual confidence. You’re the smartest sign in the cosmos; now everyone can clearly see it. A relationship comes to a new level when the Lunar Eclipse arrives on the 17th. Whether this is a commitment or an ending, you’ll be better for the change. (Psst…it’s okay to let go of that toxic ex once and for all.) Finances increase when the Sun leaves your sign for Libra on the 22nd. Hustle hard, and trust the payoff will be sweet. That same day puts Venus into the short trips sector of your chart, setting off a month of travel possibilities. A quick getaway (or three) will satisfy your need for variety. September ends with Mercury partnering up with the Sun, an excellent combo for making your money work for you. Create a savings or investment plan, and you could end the year on a profitable note. 

Libra: You’re looking spiffy this month, dear Libra. That’s because your ruling planet, Venus, is in your sign as September kicks off. Your charm and class shine through now, so don’t hesitate to show off the goods! The Sun in your 12th house makes you shy – but this will change when it enters your sign on the 22nd. When that happens, you can make your debut and claim your crown! A secret is revealed on the 2nd when the New Moon shows up. This revelation could be life-changing, so be ready to pivot soon after. Mars enters the career sector of your chart on the 4th, propelling you to new heights over the next two months. Your ascent will seem rapid, but this has been coming for a long time. Keep going – and do not take your eyes off the prize. Tie up loose work ends on the 17th’s Lunar Eclipse. If there are outstanding projects, this is your best time to get them off your calendar so you can be free to soar. It’s also possible your employment could come to a close. If that happens, be ready for a swift pivot. Once the Sun traipses into your sign on the 22nd, it’s your season! You’ll have four weeks to prove your mettle (without breaking a sweat). No matter what the world throws at you, you’ve got the moxie and spice to roll with the punches – and give it back double. The 22nd also puts Venus in your money zone, a happy transit for making cash. You’ll be attracting plenty of the green stuff all the way into mid-October, just in time for the holidays. When Mercury enters your sign on the 26th, your ability to wow with words multiplies. Now you can talk your way into and out of any situation with finesse. Ain’t no stopping you now!

Scorpio: Late summer soirees will keep you out and about this month, dear Scorpio. The Sun is dancing through the social sector of your chart for the first three weeks of September, guaranteeing plenty of fun. Say yes to any invites on the 2nd’s New Moon. You might meet intriguing new people or just have a blast boogying down on the disco round! Your ruler, Mars, enters Cancer on the 4th, creating delightful opportunities for travel all the way into November. Sign up for a cruise, book that long-distance dream journey, go to that wedding in the Bahamas – in other words: just GO. Mercury in your 11th on the 9th keeps the busyness going, so don’t expect life on the social circuit to slow down. The Lunar Eclipse on the 17th could reveal a potential suitor. If you’re in the mood for love, this day could deliver! However, if you’ve been with a scoundrel type, this Eclipse could shed light on their true motives. In that case, slam the door as give them the boot! You’re ready to head back to the cocoon when the Sun settles into your introspection zone on the 22nd. After so much “peopling,” it’s good to get back in touch with your needs. Plus, you want to be on your game when your season begins next month – so rest up! Venus will be in your sign on the 22nd, which will help you make a favorable impression. It’s here until October 17th, so if you need to wow the boss or that hottie you’ve eyed up at the coffee shop, you can do it! Secrets are revealed when Mercury joins the Sun on the 26th. You’re the zodiac’s best secret keeper, so be ready to get the dirt on multiple situations from multiple sources. Mums the word. 

Sagittarius: Your career is buzzing to new heights this month, dear Sagittarius. Opportunities to shine bright are yours for the taking, thanks to the Sun’s presence in your 10th house. A New Moon on the 2nd opens up an exciting new offer. This could be a promotion, a new job, or a visibility bump. Claim that! Mars in Cancer on the 4th gives you the power to negotiate a bigger salary. Don’t settle for less than what you WANT. Your ability to wow the public gets boosted when Mercury joins the Sun on the 9th. If you’re in the limelight, expect success. Finish real estate deals or home improvement projects when the Lunar Eclipse occurs on the 17th. It’s also the perfect day to squash family beefs. You don’t need the drama. Keep in mind, this Eclipse could bring an announcement from a loved one. Perhaps someone is ready to exit the nest? Take care of your home life, and the rest of September is clear for your take-off. On the 22nd, the Sun heads into your social sector while Venus slithers into the private part of your chart. Are you a party animal, or do you prefer clandestine flings away from prying eyes? Mercury in Libra on the 26th means you’re the talk of the town. If you want to keep your love life on the down low, be careful who you trust with your private information.  

Capricorn: As the temps begin to drop, your mind is on distant shores, dear Capricorn. For the first three weeks of September, the Sun drifts through your 9th house, inviting you to broaden your horizons through travel or books. While the rest of the world is prepping for the back-to-school season, you’re knee-deep in your own studies. One of the best ways to open your mind is via travel; the perfect opportunity arises on the 2nd when the New Moon shows up. Book something then – and let your mind take in all the sights. Relationships become testy when Mars moves into an opposition with your natal Sun on the 4th. Partners could be needy or in the mood to fight. Can you find compromise? Is it possible to listen as well as you speak? Perhaps it’s best to agree to disagree. Mercury in Virgo on the 9th will help you find common sense ways to approach arguments. Just remember to not be dismissive, even if you know the facts. This transit of Mercury is nifty for academic purposes, so perhaps immersing yourself in research is better than squabbling? The Lunar Eclipse on the 17th brings much-needed clarity. Suddenly, the cloud lifts and you can see who’s who and what’s what. Once that day comes and goes, you’ll better understand how to approach your loved ones. The Sun in your 10th house on the 22nd awakens your ambition. It also takes you out of the library and back into the world. Hiding out isn’t possible if you want to make a splash. Your friends are a source of reassurance and support, ready to cheer you on as you move up every ladder when Venus moves into Scorpio on the 22nd. You have a loyal crew – and they are more than happy to champion your goals. Mercury in your career zone on the 26th ensures your every word is potent. Consider this your change-maker era as you inspire via your shining, brilliant example. 

Aquarius: If you’ve been ignoring your financial situation, there is no better time to get on top of that than now, dear Aquarius. The Sun illuminates possible budget or tax issues as September kicks off, giving you ample opportunity to fix outstanding issues. One of the best days to speak with a financial advisor occurs when the New Moon shows up on the 2nd. Schedule an appointment then, and you might discover new ways to manage your cash. Mars in your work sector starting on the 4th boosts your hustle, ensuring you’ll bring plenty of cheddar to the table. If you need to discuss money situations with your honey, Mercury in Virgo on the 9th is the perfect time for a sit-down. Your partner’s support and understanding will reassure you and strengthen your connection. A stream of income may dry up unexpectedly on the 17th’s Lunar Eclipse. While this may feel like a disruption, it’s temporary. Stay on your grind and trust the payoff is on the way (it is). The urge to travel arises when the Sun enters your 9th house on the 22nd. Even if your budget is tight, you can find lots of inexpensive options or special deals now. You can be frugal and indulge your wanderlust at the same time! Your status at work gets a massive bump when Venus sashays into your career zone on the 22nd. A promotion or new position might bring a more considerable income (and ease your mind). Once Mercury moves into Libra on the 26th, you’re feeling groovy – and exploring new horizons. Sail on!

Pisces: Relationships could challenge you this month, dear Pisces. But fret not! This could be the nudge you need to deepen your most important connections. The Sun brings dynamic people into your orbit. While some of these are intense in a good way, others might test your resolve. Can you compromise without sacrificing your needs? A new partner emerges when the New Moon arrives on the 2nd. Could this be a significant alliance? You’ll have to wait and see. Mars makes you impatient for action when it storms into the true love sector of your chart. While this adds boldness to your flirt game, it could also make you careless. Slow it down if you want to avoid embarrassing yourself. Mercury helps you find the right words when it joins the Sun on the 9th. Conversations could turn fruitful, erasing any foolish mistakes. Now you’ve got game – so use it wisely. The Lunar Eclipse on the 17th is the perfect time to let your authentic self shine through. No more trying to please those stuck-up types. Instead, be yourself and know that the ones who get you will remain. (Psst…if you want to do a drastic makeover, this might be the right day to hire that stylist!) Intimacy heats up when the Sun cruises into your 8th house on the 22nd. You’ll have a month to merge with your beloved, so break out the make-out music and get it on! Romantic journeys are a possibility when Venus floats into your travel zone. Where do you want to go – and who might be along for the ride? A trip overseas could cement a relationship. Mercury in Libra on the 26th brings vast improvements to your pillow talk. Your words could get you into all sorts of interesting – and sexy – predicaments. Meow!

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