Stars Crossed - How to Get Along with Cancer

The Stars Crossed series focuses on astrological compatibility. While it’s way more complicated than just your Sun sign, we’re starting off with the Sun because it is an important part of your astrology profile. After all, it’s your core personality. 

This month, we look at Cancer. Keep in mind, this will be general info. As we progress in this series, we’ll look at many other details so you can get the complete picture of the Cancer in your life (or yourself). 

What to know about Cancer:

Element: Water
Quality: Cardinal
Symbol: The Crab
Ruling Planet: The Moon
Key Phrase: I feel.
Traits: caring, loyal, domestic, tenacious, moody

Cancer is the nurturer of the zodiac, which means they love to have someone to fuss over. They make excellent partners and caregivers, so lucky you if you’re connected with these tender hearts. You’ll be in great hands as they fluff your pillows, cook hearty meals, and rub your back without prompting. Because security is important to them, they’ll do whatever they can to ensure the cupboards and bank accounts are always full. Yes, they are that awesome!

But do know these kind souls have a limit. They want to be appreciated. If you take them for granted, the welcome wagon will be closed. It’s important that they feel both needed and valued. Ignore them at your peril. 

Cancer is ruled by the Moon, which means they can be moody. Their emotions fluctuate like the ebb and flow of the ocean (Water sign!). They are also prone to taking everything personally. Sometimes it can be hard living with them because they can go from friendly to sulky without warning. It’s best to let them have time to sort things out because if you push, you’ll get the Crab’s claws.

Intuition comes naturally for these sensitive folks. After all, they rule the stomach, so they trust their gut. This means even though they seem naive, they’re really not. They’ve got your number. 

Because they are a Cardinal sign, they are not passive. Instead, they enjoy being in the driver’s seat, especially regarding home and family. They tend to take charge of the castle, and you can be assured everyone is well cared for under their command.

When Cancers go bad, they can be clingy, possessive, and mean. This usually happens when they feel their security is being threatened. When they go this route, they chase away the people who want to love them. Then they bitch about being alone. Also, they can get hung up on the past, and when that happens, you’ll hear a never-ending stream of every wrong ever done. Maddening. 

Romancing a Cancer: Cancers love to be in love and adore being courted. Flowers, candy, dinners by candlelight – yes, please. They also appreciate home-cooked meals and care packages. Remember: they rule the stomach, so that’s a surefire way to their heart. Because they are sentimental, you’ll want to put plenty of thought into gifts. For example, a locket with pics of the kids or cats is perfect. Don’t be random! Here’s an important tip if you want to keep your Crab happy: never, ever threaten their security. They take that sort of thing to heart. You’ll want to keep your criticism light or risk hurting their feelings. You’ll also want to avoid flirting with others if you don’t like drama. Because they are possessive, any sign of potential straying will lead to world war three. If you break up, they might hold a torch for you. That doesn’t mean they’ll return. Instead, there will always be a soft spot in their hearts for you. Unless you do something idiotic. In that case, they’ll never let you forget it. Also: they are very sensual, but it takes time for them to loosen up. You gotta prove you’re trustworthy before they remove their shell.

Cancer parents: No one dotes on their child more than a Cancer parent. They love, love, love kids. Nurturing comes naturally to them, meaning the whole maternal/paternal thing seems built-in. Cancer parents are affectionate, protective, and sympathetic. They’ll make sure the kids have everything they need and then some. Home-baked cookies, stories at bedtime, lots of hugs – that’s their typical mode. The mothers are especially devoted, which can lead to codependency if taken too far. In that case, cutting the apron strings may be difficult for the child. The Cancer parent needs to let their kids be independent. While being deeply involved in their upbringing is lovely, they risk smothering the child if they play the helicopter role. Chill out!

Cancer children: Cancer children are sweet-natured and loving. They are easy to love, too, because they are so affectionate. Many of them became deeply attached to the mother figures in their lives. In fact, you’ll often find Cancer children taking care of their parents later in life (even if the parents weren’t great). They’ll show signs that they are natural caregivers at an early age. They might be interested in dolls or caring for pets. In some cases, they’ll look out for their younger siblings. It’s important for the parents not to “parentify” the Cancer child. If they put them in a caretaker role early on, the child may later feel like they weren’t allowed to be a kid. Little Crabs are sensitive, so their feelings are easily hurt. You must be mindful of their feelings if you’re in charge of one of these tender-hearted youngsters. They take things to heart – so teasing and criticism must be gentle. Lastly, they can be sulky and moody. When they are “in a mood,” give them time to sort it out. A snack and nap usually do the trick (even for adult Cancers!).

Cancer bosses: Cancer bosses treat their employees like family. Which can be good or bad, depending on their family life. If they come from a happy family, you’re in luck! They’ll take great care of you and will support you all the way. But if they come from a dysfunctional crew, they’ll revisit that at work. I’ve found Cancer bosses to be the best or the worst – and almost every time, how they are at work reflects their home life or upbringing. They expect plenty of loyalty; if they don’t get it, they can be petty as hell.

Cancer employees: Cancer employees are loyal, hard-working, and caring. They want to do a good job. This means they’ll go the extra mile to ensure everything is done right. Relationships are important to them, so they’ll form strong connections with their coworkers and bosses. I once knew a Cancer who brought cupcakes, pastries, and donuts to work. No surprise they were the most popular person at the office! Work becomes another “home” for them, with their work family almost on the same level as their “real” family. Security is vital to them, so they’ll seek solid jobs where they can stay put. However, they are moody, so if something pisses them off, they’ll have no trouble saying, “Take this job and shove it.”

Cancer friends: You can count on a Cancer friend when the chips are down. They are excellent listeners and always there when you need them the most. These are the ones to call when going through a breakup. They’ll bring over cookies, let you cry, and then tell you, “fuck him/her.” Because they are protective, they might look out for you better than you look out for yourself. Cancers can be great fun. Get them on the dance floor and watch these shy violets cut up a rug. Also: they throw fab parties. The hostess with the mostest? Cancer’s realm. But they can be clingy. If they think you’re not giving them enough attention, they might cop an attitude. It’s not that they don’t like to share. They don’t want to feel taken for granted. If you lose touch with a Cancer, they’ll love it if you show up unexpectedly. Blasts from the past are welcome. There will always be a special spot in their hearts for “old” friends.

I hope you enjoy this peek into the loving, moody Cancer Suns. Next up: Leo Suns.



If you want to cover astrological basics, be sure to check out my book, Astrology For Real Life: A No B.S. Guide for the AstroCurious.

image from stock photography

@ Theresa Reed | The Tarot Lady 2023


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