The Hit List - When you’ve had a hard year and don’t feel the holiday spirit

2023 can suck it. I don’t know about you, but this year was ROUGH AF (all caps on purpose). I’ve had tough years before, but this one took the cake by the nads. Needless to say, I’m counting down the days until I can tell 2023 to kiss my grits!

While I’ve never been a holiday person, it’s been hard to get into the spirit this year. I’ve been too dragged to even care. I’m still sorting out some heavy trauma, and it’s pretty much eaten up my Christmas joy. This doesn’t mean I’m not celebrating. It just means I need to do the holidays differently because I’m all out of energy and effs to give. 

If your 2023 was a hot chocolate mess with a side of garbage, you might feel less like ho-ho-ho and more like no-no-no. But what if you have family or little ones who are already donning their gay apparel and decking the halls? You certainly don’t want to Scrooge them out of all the festive stuff. 

Here are a few thoughts/ideas for those of us who just can’t…but might have to:

Gifts: Consider making this a no-gift year. Our family decided the only gifts this year will be for the kids. This takes so much pressure off. Frankly, I don’t know why we didn’t do this years ago. I’ve also done the same with a few friends. I don’t want anyone feeling obligated – and I don’t want to be either.

Cards: If you’re a card sending type, that task may feel like one more burden. I hear ya. I’ve always sent holiday greetings. By this time, the cards are in the mail. Usually, I send out a sleighful. I’m taking a pass this year. I’ll send a few, but that’s it. I don’t have the bandwidth. If you’re low on energy, skip this. Most of those cards are thrown immediately in the garbage anyway.

Time off: Take time off for nothing at all. It will do you good. Normally, I work through this season. Not this year. I’m taking plenty of stuff off the calendar so I can rest. I need to recuperate.

Potluck: Do you get stuck cooking the holiday feast? That’s normally my role. While part of me loves fiddling in the kitchen, I am too overwhelmed this year. We’re doing a potluck.. I suggest you do the same if you’re not feeling it. Enlist everyone to bring a dish and this will take the pressure off. Don’t forget to ask for help with the clean-up.

No to events and gatherings: You don’t have to attend every event. Seriously. You CAN say no. For example,  I have only two things on the calendar: breakfast with Santa and the grandbaby (tomorrow!) and dinner with the family on Christmas Day. That’s it. No running around, no hectic anything. Everything else is NOPE.

No explanations or apologies: Why do we feel like apologizing or explaining ourselves when we are not in the spirit? I guess we don’t want to be “that person.” But this year, I don’t give a rat’s booty what anyone thinks. Frankly, they should worry about their own mistletoe. Do not make excuses or apologies if you bow out of an event – or altogether. You don’t owe anyone anything. 

Seek help: If you’re really down in the dumps this year, please seek support. 7 Cups offers free chat services and affordable online therapy. Crisis Text Line is another option: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a volunteer Crisis Counselor. Do not suffer in silence.

My mother loved the holidays. Big shindigs were her thing. It’s hard to break this habit when it’s been ingrained in your bones, but after this year, I am doing the bare minimum. Maybe, just maybe, this will be my new tradition. However, if 2024 is fabulous, I might sing a different carol then.



Other stuff:

Are you having trouble finding the right gift for your fave peeps? Let astrology help you pick the best prezzies!

The bestseller lists are broken.

Is Timothee Chalamet’s hearthrob status really over?

There are some interesting thoughts here about the state of tarot in 2023, but I don’t agree with some of these points.  I think tarot is gonna be just fine.

I love her: Traffic reporter responds to body shaming email on live TV.

Peach fuzz is in.

From Cosmo: Your Horoscope for the New Moon in Sagittarius Is Here.

We need to fix this: Social Services Have a Major Gap, Leaving Homeless Youth With ‘No Good Choices.’

We’ve still got a long way to go: Women Creatives Thought Hollywood Could Change. Were They Wrong?

Lucky numbers: The 12/12 Portal Is a Lucky Day for Manifesting Your Dream Life.

Interesting: Why Are Girls Diagnosed With Autism Later Than Boys?

I support this: Big Big Hair And Bright Bold Patterns Of The 80’s Are Back And Thriving On Instagram.

Uh oh: There’s One Zodiac Sign That’s Most Likely to Get Divorced, Astrologers Say.

Some of these choices are good, while others…not so much: 9 best tarot card decks for beginners, according to expert readers.

NEED: Permission to Rest: Revolutionary Practices for Healing, Empowerment, and Collective.

I love etymology books: Words from Hell: Unearthing the darkest secrets of English etymology.

Look at this beautiful book from Neil Gaiman and a crew of talented artists: What You Need to Be Warm.

WANT: It’s On Me: Accept Hard Truths, Discover Your Self, and Change Your Life.

Coming soon: Make Your Own Magic: A Beginner’s Guide to Self-Empowering Witchcraft.

Oooh: Cookbook of Shadows: Simple Recipes for Powerful Magick.

Mitch Horowitz has a new book on the way: Happy Warriors: The Lives and Ideas of the Positive-Mind Mystics.

Check this out: Rebel Witches Tarot.

Yes, please: Granny Thornapple’s Book of Charms: Magic & Folklore from the Ozark Mountains.

For those who want to develop their intuition: 21 Days to Jump-Start Your Intuition: Awaken Your Most Empowering Super Sense.

A tarot journal is the perfect holiday gift for those card lovers in your orbit: The Weiser Tarot Journal: Guidance and Practice.

If you are struggling this season, this book might help: The Cards You’re Dealt: How to Deal when Life Gets Real (A Tarot Guidebook).

Make 2024 your bitch with tarot and astrology: Twist Your Fate: Manifest Success with Astrology and Tarot.

What every kid wants in their stocking this year: Tarot For Kids.

Are you still relying on the little white book that came with your tarot deck? Get off the book with: Tarot: No Questions Asked: Mastering the Art of Intuitive Reading.

Prefer to listen to your tarot lessons? Check this out: Tarot: No Questions Asked: Mastering the Art of Intuitive Reading is available as an audiobook.

Want to be the most popular person at your office holiday party? Start rattling off astrology info. Learn how to do that with: Astrology for Real Life: A Workbook for Beginners (A No B.S. Guide for the Astro-Curious).

There is an audio version if you prefer: Astrology For Real Life.

While you’re shopping for everyone else, don’t forget to treat yourself: The Uncommon Tarot: A Contemporary Reimagining of an Ancient Oracle.

Looking for a quiet activity after hitting the mall? Grab colored pencils, a blanket, and The Tarot Coloring Book. Serenity now!

This book was written a few years ago. It’s more relevant than ever: Tarot For Troubled Times.

Tired of the tarot decks on the market? Make your own with this little kit: Create Your Own Tarot Cards: A step-by-step guide to designing a unique and personalized tarot deck. <-Cards are included!

I’ve been using astrology to guide my business for years. Now you can use this ancient science to superpower your biz too: The AstroBiz Digest.

The perfect thing to level up your holiday spirit: Sign up here.

Write better. Get inspired by fellow authors. Learn about the publishing industry and how to market. The Metaphysical Author’s Confidential – a newsletter for mystical writers: The Metaphysical Author’s Confidential. Essays and lessons on writing, publishing, and marketing your magical book.


Classes and Events

Join my Patreon Community!  I am serving up extended card-of-the-day interpretations, astrological tidbits, community tarot practice, political astrology, early sneak peeks at horoscopes….and more. Higher tiers get access to live classes, replays of previous classes, mentoring, and more.

Advanced Tarot Techniques. Join me for this four-part online class and learn about timing, decans, how to create your own tarot spreads, and more. Starts April 5th, 2024.

Pens and Cards. October 18-19th, 2024. Picton, Canada. Learn how to use tarot to inspire your writing with yours truly and Sarah Selecky. Details coming soon.


What I’m Grateful For:

Long calls with old friends

Parties with people I love

Rainy Decembers

Watching my plants grow

Thick hand lotion


Soundtrack for 12/2/23

Make Way by Protomartyr

© Theresa Reed | The Tarot Lady 2023

images from stock photography and personal collection 

*Some of the links are affiliate links. I receive a small fee if you purchase, but this does not affect the price of the item.*


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