The Hit List - Bandwidth, capacity, and spoons

One of the beautiful things about getting older is that you become acutely aware of what your capacity is. You begin to discover that it’s markedly different than it was when you were younger. This is a good development, especially if your tendency is to work your fingers down to the knuckle bone.

As I move to my mid-50’s (yikes – where did that time go???), I have been learning to respect this capacity.

Staying up all night partying with friends? Nope. That’s been replaced with praying to the sleep gods for a full night’s rest. Because at this age, the only time I’m up in the wee hours is due to insomnia – and I can assure you, it’s not cool nor fun.

Working twelve hour days seven days a week? NO. Fitting in “emergency readings” or “just a quick session” – don’t bother requesting that. It’s. Not. Going. To. Happen. EVER.

I don’t have the bandwidth to work more than I already do.

I also don’t have the spoons for unreasonable demands, rudeness, excuses, or boundary pushers.


I don’t have the spoon, forks, knives, machetes, and axes for that. If drama is your bag, I’m not interested. The only drama that I follow is Game of Thrones. Period.

They say you become more tolerant as you age. In some ways, that’s true. You’re more patient because you know that life will always have bumps and curve balls. And people are…well…people. 

But tolerance does not mean working to exhaustion, honoring bullshit requests, or allowing people to treat you like a dumping ground. Time is more precious now and that time is better served doing things you love with the people who love and respect you.

With retirement only a decade away, I know that it’s inevitable that my capacity will continue to shift and I will need to honor it. Not just as a tarot reader but also as a human who wants a meaningful life. Time is the only thing that is finite, my friends. No matter where you are at this stage in your life, the clock is running. Make every minute count and don’t be afraid to dictate how that time is managed or who is allowed in to share those precious moments with you.

Gray hair, don't care.

Gray hair, don’t care.

Other Stuff:

My favorite post of the week is from Lisa Fabrega: I feel ashamed.

We want answers: 25 Questions That Game of Thrones Needs to Answer in Its Final Season.

I Think About This A Lot: Game of Thrones Edition.

Watchers on the Wall speculate about the Benioff and Weiss Spotify playlist.

From Bustle: The One Zodiac Sign You’ll Probably Have Difficulty Getting Along With, Based On Your Sign.

Meet Katie Bouman: The woman behind the first black hole image.

Interesting: Black holes and astrology.

More on black holes and astrology from Refinery29: What The First Black Hole Photo Means For Astrology.

Nora Ephron writes about her cookbook crushes. I can SO relate.

Here are the best questions to ask tarot about your ex.

Ashley Judd Shares the Very Personal Reason She’s Opposed to Georgia’s Abortion Ban.

The ABC’s of CBD.

Well duh YES: The 50 Diaries: Should You Try Tarot?

Here’s How to Decode Your Dreams Using Astrology!

Georgetown Students Vote to Pay Reparations to Aid Descendants of Enslaved People Sold by the University.

I love shrooms: Mushroom Glossary: Get to Know These Delicious Varieties.

If you Belieb in astrology and love – check this out: Does Justin Bieber’s Birth Chart Prove He and Selena Gomez Were Doomed From the Start?

She’s a Libra so there ya go: The Awakening of Kim Kardashian West.

A comprehensive history of women’s underwear.

Here’s what the tarot readings in Sabrina actually mean.

Melissa Cynova interviews tarot legend Rachel Pollack!

In this week’s Tarot Bytes, I’m talking with Shaheen Miro about Tarot and Shadow Work.

How this café owner is creating space for Black women in the coffee business.

The Voluptuous Witch has a fab monthly subscription: Cosmic Coven.

Oprah is smart: Oprah Bought an Avocado Orchard Because Grocery Store Avocados Were Too Expensive.

Genetic Astrology: When Ancient DNA Meets Ancestry Testing.

I just got my copy of The Melanated Classic Tarot. Two Sides Tarot interviewed Oubria, the artist behind this amazing deck!

Siobhan Johnson writes about when bad things happen after you start practicing witchcraft.

Inspiration from Abby Walmbach: WOLFPACK: How to Come Together, Unleash Our Power, and Change the Game.

I love astrology books: The Signs: Decode the Stars, Reframe Your Life.

Ooo: Everyday Magic: Rituals, Spells & Potions to Live Your Best Life.

Want this: Written in the Stars: Constellations, Facts and Folklore.

I read a lot of books about money: The Latte Factor: Why You Don’t Have to Be Rich to Live Rich.

New from Meggan Watterson: Mary Magdalene Revealed: The First Apostle, Her Feminist Gospel & the Christianity We Haven’t Tried Yet.

The Tarot Coloring Book is for people who want to learn about tarot in a creative, experiential way.

You can preorder Tarot For Troubled Times – it’s my latest with my co-author, the wonderful Shaheen Miro!

Love astrology but can’t make heads or tails out of it? My third book will help you out: Astrology for Real Life: A Workbook for Beginners (A No B.S. Guide for the Astro-Curious). You can pre-order it now!


I’m teaching at New Renaissance Books in Portland, Oregon on July 2nd at 6:30. Tarot Cards for Shadow Work – Together we’ll explore shadow work, Tarot archetypes, Birth Cards, finding the good in “bad” cards – and the dark side in the “good” ones. You’ll come away with knowledge about your Tarot Birth Card and some suggestions for making peace with your shadow.

If you’re in the Bay Area, join Chris Zydel and me on July 7th for Brushes + Cards + Shadows An Intuitive Painting and Tarot Workshop. It will be EPIC! ONLY THREE SEATS LEFT!

Join me and Shaheen on Friday, July 26th for a Tarot For Troubled Times event and book signing! Where: Free Spirit Crystals in Butler, Wisconsin. What time: 7 PM. Cost: Free!

Tarot for Troubled Times with Shaheen Miro and Theresa Reed. Learn about shadow work, archetypes, tarot birth cards, and remedies for tough times. Boston Tea Room in Ferndale, Michigan. Details coming soon!


What I’m Grateful For:


A fresh bowl of berries

Sun, sun, sun

New sunglasses

Suprises in the mail

Great conversations amongst peers


Soundtrack for 4/13/19:

Middle Child by J Cole



© Theresa Reed | The Tarot Lady 2019

images from stock photography and personal collection


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